On Being A Biological Tour-de-Freak

By: Victoria Han, former Doulos member (Class of 2010)

Read: Matthew 6:25-34

Technically I’m a biological failure. Oh, I’ve had a bit of success in school. I’ve managed to worm my way into college. I don’t drink or do drugs. I don’t face severe depression nor am I on any medication for any reason. I’ve never gotten a ticket for driving which is more than most licensed people can say. I suppose one of the worst things I’ve done in my life is the occasional failure to pay my library fines. However, in the unfeeling eyes of biology, I am a failure because I have not reproduced and have thus failed to secure any future bloodlines. Suffice to say that as of now, I will soon cease to exist entirely.

The drive to reproduce is so ingrained into us that society’s expectation for many of us is to marry and have children. The “happily ever after” is the white strapless dress, the tiered cake, and the beautiful moment of “I do.” Of course the next logical step is the baby (or babies as the case may be). Some couples may wait for a few years while some may get to it right away. However in our society, a childless couple is either pitied or held as an anomaly. After all, isn’t the “American Dream” the quaint house and the white picket fence holding children playing on the lawn?

As I’ve slowly grown up and gone through youth group, I’ve seen the pressure put onto Ben in his BA (“before Annie”) days by the numerous adults in the church. From the hinting jokes to the outright questions of “Ben, when are you getting married?” there was always an underlying pressure for Ben to find a wife. While Ben has found one of the most incredible woman in the world and has successfully made her his wife, his journey of faith to get there was a long one.

Faith is defined as “being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” (Heb 11:1). I feel faith is one of the hardest things to have, especially in such a self-reliant society. Raised by parents who wanted me to major in something that would earn me money, I often wondered why I couldn’t simply major in something that didn’t guarantee a comfortable salary and instead rely on God to provide for me. After all, didn’t God promise that he would look after us in the passage we’ve read for today?

Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness. While I was arguing semantics with my parents for the sake of being a rebellious child, I often lost my focus on what mattered. People often say that “God has a plan for us” and for awhile, I thought it meant that God has planned my life for me and that I would eventually meander my way into where He wanted me to be when He wanted me to be there. However, I don’t think this is the case. God has provided us with free will and choice. I think as long as we seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, all else by default will fall into place, no matter which path we choose. “Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld.” (2 Chr. 20:20)